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A parody · polar opposite of cliffmaloney.com · Selling Doors for CK

CK Showroom

Doors. For sale. For CK.

Polar opposite of a canvass. Nothing here has been knocked. Everything here can be invoiced. Hinges extra. Principles not included.

The Never-Knocked Oak

CK-000 · Kiln-dried white oak

The Never-Knocked Oak

Six panels. Zero visitors. Hinges that only swing inward, toward the couch.

$1,776
Peace Knocker in Sage

CK-HUG · Dusty sage enamel

Peace Knocker in Sage

A front door for people who would like the republic to take a personal day.

$1,488
The Red Wall (Discontinued)

CK-R.I.P · Cherry-red high gloss

The Red Wall (Discontinued)

Formerly a metaphor. Now a product. Does not prevent national elections. May prevent drafts.

$2,024
Blue Hallway Dutch Door

CK-BLU · Periwinkle milk paint

Blue Hallway Dutch Door

Top half open for mail-in ballots. Bottom half closed to canvassers. Polar opposite of a chase.

$1,865
Mandate Mail-Slot Steel

CK-VBM · Matte security black

Mandate Mail-Slot Steel

100% vote-by-mail compatible. Cliff 100% supports a mandate on the slot. (Gasp.) Yep.

$2,016
The Sidelines Slider

CK-SIT · Walnut on iron track

The Sidelines Slider

Doesn’t swing. Doesn’t knock. Just quietly leaves the conversation.

$918
Transom of Commission

CK-ROI · Farmhouse white, oval lite

Transom of Commission

Look through the oval glass for invoices, not ballots. Best ROI at moving the needle in millwork.

$1,976
Open-Everything Screen

CK-AIR · Sage screen, pine frame

Open-Everything Screen

A door that is barely a door. For the legislator pledged to raise every tax and every window.

$511